Like father, like son

Micah in 2nd grade. Caleb in 2nd grade.

Is that CRAZY or what?!

Clammin' and a ticket

A month or so ago, we went to Tolmie State park with all 4 of the munchkins. The trip was especially exciting for Caleb who noticed people digging in the sand on the hunt for clams. He tried his hand and dug up a few himself, but we were unsure of the shellfish laws and told Caleb we couldn't keep any because that would be dishonest. It was a tough lesson for him on integrity, but he made the right choice and put them back. We promised him we would take him clamming another time when we knew it was legal. ;) So after doing a little research, we found out that kids under 15 can take up to 40 butter/steamer clams a day from this beach and they do not need a license. A more thorough check on the Department of Health website affirmed that there were no health warnings in effect. SO, off we went to the beach. Caleb toted his little plastic yellow bucket and garden shovel. I CANNOT believe I didn't bring my camera!!! At least I captured some photos of his success: 11 steamer clams that he personally cleaned and steamed in garlic butter. He was SO proud of himself!

Trying the "neck."

Not so sure.....

"Hey Dad! Do you eat this black part?"

Don't they look *delicious?* ;)

Caitlyn trying her share...which she surprisingly loved!

Caleb shared a couple of his clams, but slurped down the rest himself. We just finished dinner about 1/2 hour ago, and he is already asking when we can go again. :)

Speaking of integrity, when we got back to our car we had a ticket on our window for not having a "discovery pass." Oops! We honestly did not know we needed to purchase one and the Park Ranger happened to be near our car when we returned to it. After a brief conversation with Micah, it somehow came up that we were foster parents. The ranger ripped up our ticket, handed it back to Micah and proceeded to thank Micah for our sacrifice as foster parents .

Even though that gesture probably seems like a small thing to most of you, the last few months have included many dark, challenging days with our Ellie and it blessed my heart to just know that someone recognized the challenge and the sacrifice we are making. As I've stated before, our hearts for foster care are not to receive accolades or pats on the back, but once in a while, when I've felt especially discouraged, it seems as though there have been strategic conversations and little words of encouragement that have kept us pressing forward. Today, that encouragement came in the form of clams and a ripped up ticket. <3

A rough day

I know I frequently post photos on facebook of the kids and our "happy moments"--trips to the beach, riding bikes, birthday parties, playtime with friends, etc. We have many happy times that I love to capture with my camera, and I also have a little journal where I write down the crazy (and embarrassing) things the kids say. :) And as much as I like to chronicle the positive things in our lives, like any family--the reality is, there are rough times too.

Yesterday was a hard day. A day that left me worn out. Sad. Hurting for my sweet Caitlyn. Here is what happened:

Caitlyn decided that she wanted to surprise me by making my bed....a challenging task for a teeny tiny like her. She asked me to leave my bedroom while she "worked on something." I stood outside the door for a minute and listened as she talked herself through the steps of making a bed. "Put on the sheet.......ugh! Ow! This is hawd (hard)! Get the blankets! After a minute or so of hearing her wrestle to get the sheets, blankets, duvet, duvet cover (yes it is July but we are still FREEZING!) up off of the floor and onto the bed, I smiled to myself and went downstairs, pleased with my baby girl and her tender heart. Ellie wanted to know what she was doing and went upstairs to help, but Caitlyn asked her to leave because she wanted to "do it by herself." Without much resistance, Ellie went into her bedroom which is next door to ours and I could hear her playing happily.

After about 15 minutes, Caitlyn came downstairs to get me, took me by the hand, and made me close my eyes while she led me upstairs. She was SO tickled to show me her surprise! But unfortunately, the next few minutes did not go as she had planned. After Caitlyn came downstairs to get me, Ellie, who was apparently mad at Caitlyn, went into our bedroom, pulled all of the sheets and blankets off of the bed, threw them onto the floor, and as Caitlyn opened the bedroom door to surprise me, there was Ellie, jumping on the heap of blankets on the floor mocking with the jingle "neener, neener, neener!" Caitlyn burst into tears and Ellie laughed harder. Caitlyn was heartbroken. I was heartbroken for Caitlyn.

I picked Ellie up, put her in her bed, and made her stay there for an hour. I knew that a time out wouldn't work. I knew that taking away a privilege wouldn't work. I knew that making her apologize to Caitlyn wouldn't work. Unfortunately, I wasn't sure what would work. I was at the end of my rope. If this was the first time something like this had happened, I might have had a little more patience. A little more grace. But this is something that happens pretty regularly and it is taxing on this Mama. After putting Ellie in her bed, I went back, picked up Caitlyn, and just held her while she cried. I ran my fingers through her hair and cried along with her. When kids hurt, Mommies hurt too. What Ellie had done was premeditated, and mean.

God has called us to this journey. It is not an easy one. Yes, it is rewarding. Yes, there is peace knowing we are in His will for our lives. But the reality still remains: this is HARD. Some days are harder than others. Some days we see a glimmer of hope and that glimmer is what keeps us pressing forward. We love Elliana dearly and are SO thankful she is going to be a permanent member of our family. But sometimes, when I am laying in bed and all my kids are sleeping, I question the cost. I have moments where I say, "Are you sure I have the patience and grace I need to do this, Lord? Are you sure I am capable? Do you really think I have what it takes to do this?" Thankfully, those moments are frequently followed by a word of encouragement, an applicable Bible verse I stumble upon, or a breakthrough I see in one of our kids.

I feel challenged today. Desperate for Jesus to give me strength and perseverance. Desperate for our little Ellie to know deep in her heart that she is unconditionally loved and that we will never abandon her or treat her any different than our other kids. We want her to feel safe. Secure. Cherished. Adored. Precious.

If you think of us, would you pray for us? We would continue to appreciate your prayers for strength, wisdom, and guidance as we try to fumble our way through this journey. God has been so gracious to entrust His us with these precious children and we can use all the wisdom we can get as we try to raise them for His glory. Thank you! <3

4th of July Celebration!

We had a jam-packed, super-fun, hot, wild, day! Micah started off by participating in the "SWAT challenge" at our local park. He placed 2nd for his age group! :) Meanwhile, the kids and I took ooey, gooey cinnamon rolls over to Woggie and Pop Pop's house for breakfast. We then spent time playing on the slip and slide, BBQing burgers and hot dogs, eating popsicles, and laying in the hammock! After lunch we headed downtown for the 4th of July parade where the kids loaded up their bags with all sorts of confectionary treats! After the parade, we headed up to some friends' house for yet another BBQ. We ended the night by watching fireworks with our friends, then stopping on the side of the road on the way home to watch the fireworks at the fairgrounds! :) A long, but fun day!

Elliana Joy

Here is a photo of our little Ellie when we first got her (March 2010). When I look back at the photos I have of her from the first few months she was with us, most of them look like this--flat, void of emotion, indifferent. It is honestly hard to look at them sometimes as it is a glaring reminder to me of all that had transpired in her little life in the months leading up to her arrival with us. However! God has done an amazing work in her and in all of us and we have some exciting news to share! From the day we got Ellie, we said we would adopt her if that ever became an option. We attended every meeting at DSHS we could, were present at every court hearing regarding her, and have known for quite sometime that adoption was "likely." In court last July, the judge changed Ellie's "permanent plan" to adoption, but we also knew that we had to let the case run it's course and that there were no guarantees. We had court again just last Thursday and although we were confident the judge would not be returning Ellie to either biological parent, a little "snag" knocked our case back a bit and we were discouraged that it would still be many months before she was legally free (officially 'available' for adoption) and another year or more after that before our adoption was finalized.

Then, in nothing short of a MIRACLE, we were informed that she is legally free, um, NOW!!! I cannot even begin to express how overjoyed we feel! Both parents have relinquished their legal rights and Ellie will be part of our "forever family" just as soon as we can have our adoption homestudy completed! We are seriously so baffled that this happened so quick! It is definitely NOT what we had expected!

I love how God works. I love that He knows the desires of our hearts. I love that He knew the timeline all along, and chose to bless us and surprise us by expediting the process. I love that our little Ellie is growing, thriving, showing empathy, smiling, learning to obey, fun, energetic, full of life, and becoming teachable.

(Ellie-Spring 2011)

We love you SO MUCH, Elliana Joy. We are thrilled to be your family. You have already taught us so much about love, grace, and redemption and we are honored and humbled to be your Mommy and Daddy.

Playing Catch Up!

Sorry for the delay in blog posts, friends, but this Mama has been busy. Like really busy. Like end-of-the-school-year-with-one-homeschooler-and-one-public-school-preschooler-and-one-Christian-School-Kindergartener-busy. Oh yeah! And busy with this adorable little guy.....

Isn't he a cutie? He'll be hangin' with us for a while. We're happy to love on him while we can.

Let me just say, for the record, that having 4 kids is a real hoot! Micah and Caleb just got home this evening from an overnight fishing trip and I had just the "big girls" and the baby....I told my mom I couldn't believe how easy 3 kids felt! And Caleb (the one who was gone) is even my biggest helper! It is amazing how much your parenting "muscles" grow as each child is added.

In other news, our Caitlyn turned SIX years old last month. How in the world did that happen? I am pretty sure that I was JUST snuggling with my sweet baby girl in the rocking chair before laying her down in her crib for the night. Wasn't I? She wanted "rainbow" cupcakes for her birthday party at school so I made these for her. Since I am FAR from "Suzy Homemaker, I have to say I was pretty impressed with how these turned out! ;)

Unfortunately, Caitlyn woke up on her birthday with Strep for the 3rd (or was it the 4th?) time in 10 weeks, so she didn't get to have a birthday party at school that day. She did, however, get a birthday doughnut for breakfast.

Yes, those are Christmas jammies, and yes, this was in May. But it was the kid's birthday and I wasn't going to argue with her over footed jammies. Plus, she was so kind and gracious to share with the rest of the family on HER birthday. That's right--she gave the other 3 kids and Mommy her Strep Throat! Wasn't that nice of her to share?! Our counter then looked like this....

I think we're outta' the woods now. These drugs kicked Strep to the curb and after repeated toothbrush changes, investing in stock for Clorox wipes and a junk drawer full of hand sanitizer, I am confident our house is germ free (at least for now)!

OK, one more photo. Aren't these 4 precious? This is such a classic photo of Ellie. :)

This weeks edition of "YOU MIGHT JUST"

Well, here you have it, folks. Due to popular demand, another edition of "you might just....."

*After getting the kids to bed, tidying the house, folding some laundry and then sitting down to snuggle up and watch a movie on the couch, YOU MIGHT JUST be disgusted when you realize your dog has barfed right next to the couch, on the ONLY rug in your house!

*YOU MIGHT JUST be REALLY ticked off, when she does it AGAIN, at the other end of the same rug a few minutes later!

*When driving down the freeway and hearing child #3 yell, "Mommy! Look at my private!" YOU MIGHT JUST spit out the water you were drinking all over your steering wheel and say, "I'm sorry, WHAT did you say, Sweetie?"

*When she repeats herself as children #1 and #2 don't know whether to laugh or be mortified, YOU MIGHT JUST look in the rearview mirror to see child #3 with a wrapper she turned into a PIRATE mask. YOU MIGHT JUST realize that she doesn't actually mean "private," she means "pirate." YOU MIGHT JUST breathe a sigh of relief that for once, your precious children did not discredit your motherly capabilities by shouting these embarrassing comments in public!

*When taking your kids to a place filled with bouncy houses, slides, and tubes to crawl through, YOU MIGHT JUST want to give your prone-to-motion-sickness child some drammamine BEFORE you go. Oh! AND, you might not want to give that kid a double cheeseburger and fries in the parking lot before heading inside.

*If you don't, YOU MIGHT JUST find that other parents and kids will quarantine you upon their discovery that your child is in fact throwing up that cheeseburger and fries all over himself.

*When your witty 8-year-old begs you to play April Fools jokes on him this year, YOU MIGHT JUST do a little internet research to come up with some *creative* and *hilarious* pranks to play on him. And when he wakes up on the morning of April 1st, YOU MIGHT JUST chuckle to yourself at the tricks up your sleeve. However, when sitting at the dinner table that night, YOU MIGHT JUST feel terrible as your 8-year-old sits there sobbing as a result of a joke you played on him. He MIGHT JUST be incredibly disappointed after Mommy told him, "Now sprinkle some salt on top of this plate of pudding and then put your hand over it.....the heat from your hand will turn the pudding into rainbow colors!" And when he looked at Mommy, in awe, and excitedly put his palm over that plate... WHACK! Mommy squished that little hand right into the pudding!

*After patting yourself on the back for the creative April Fool's jokes you played on your kids, YOU MIGHT JUST discover in the weeks following that your children think it's HILARIOUS to play April Fools jokes on you. Can you say "reaaranged dresser drawers and chocolate pudding smeared on the toilet seat?"

*Finally, after cleaning up after the previously mentioned dog that barfed on the carpet, YOU MIGHT JUST think you are still smelling "dog smell" for the rest of the night. You might finish that movie you were watching, fall asleep on the couch, and then wake up a couple hours later to drag yourself to bed. And as your head hits that nice feather pillow, YOU MIGHT JUST somewhat coherently say, "Honey? Call me crazy, but I swear that I still smell dog pee or something!" Your husband MIGHT JUST say he doesn't smell anything, until he puts his head down on his pillow and realizes that THAT STUPID DOG had jumped up on our bed and PEED on BOTH OF OUR PILLOWS! Seriously?! What kind of potty trained dog jumps up on your bed, pees on your pillows, and then acts like everything is normal?

Stay tuned for next week's edition. I'm sure I will have several *wonderful* moments to reflect upon. :)

"You might just......."

The month of March has been quite entertaining. Here's a little peek into some of our daily "happenings."

*When going to the pet store to buy your 8-year-old a new fish, YOU MIGHT JUST want to buy the cheap ones instead of spending 6.99 for one that dies 1 day after the expiration of the 'fish death' return policy. OH! And if you DO decide to buy an expensive one, YOU MIGHT JUST want to buy one, instead of 3 at once.....

*When having a friend's 2-year-old over, YOU MIGHT JUST want to make sure that that sweet lil' one isn't upstairs trying to feed those expensive fish---by dumping out the entire Costco-sized fish food all over the fishtank and floor....

*When your sweet husband can't find his cell phone and blames you for losing it, YOU MIGHT JUST chuckle to yourself the next day when that same sweet husband finds it in your water-filled crockpot in the sink...and realizes that when he set his phone to vibrate mode, it vibrated off of the windowsill he left it on and right into your crockpot!

*When you realize that your husband now has to pay to replace that darn cellphone, YOU MIGHT JUST stop laughing.

*When out to dinner at Red Robin and your delightful 3-year-old turns around and says "THAT LADY LOOKS MAD" in the ear of "mad lady" in the booth behind you, YOU MIGHT JUST ask for your food "to go." We didn't.

*When taking all of your children to the Dr. and the aforementioned 3-year-old looks at the Dr. and says, "you look weird! You don't have any hair!" YOU MIGHT JUST be thankful that you've known this kind, Grandpa of a Dr. for years. However, YOU MIGHT JUST want to crawl into a hole and hide anyways.

*When your kids are in a church musical, YOU MIGHT JUST think they are the most adorable, talented, children EVER.....even if they played the part of "rocks."

*When trying to interpret the growing language of your 3-year-old, YOU MIGHT JUST want to discover sooner-than-later that "itty booty" in fact, means, icky boogie...on her finger....and then YOU MIGHT JUST want to search your house from top to bottom with lysol wipes in hand to locate all the places she has decided to leave those "itty booties."

*When getting a new foster baby, YOU MIGHT JUST be reminded once again that children are a precious gift from God, and each day you have with ANY of your children, biological or not, is a gift. YOU MIGHT JUST find yourself amazed at the sanctity of life and the miracle that each child is. :)

*When your children ask to eat breakfast on the floor, in bowls, like the dogs, YOU MIGHT JUST let them-- thinking the novelty will wear off really quick. However, YOU MIGHT JUST learn that they think eating like that is REALLY COOL and then have to retrain them to eat at the table. YOU MIGHT JUST find yourself feeling really embarrassed that your kids, in fact, LIKE to eat like dogs, for some odd reason.....

*OH! And finally, when your daughter gets strep throat for the second time in 6 weeks, YOU MIGHT JUST want to throw her toothbrush away so she stops reinfecting herself!! Then YOU MIGHT JUST feel incredible stupid when your nurse says, "We told you that!"

"N" week

Caitlyn with her "nurse" outfit and cast.

Last week was "N" week at Caitlyn's school. They had a wonderful time....making noodles (with butter and cheese), making noodle necklaces, looking at nests, talking about Noah's ark, numbers, and then Friday was "Nurse Day!" Caitlyn's teacher and I filled the role as nurses as we taught the kids how to use a stethescope, take out stitches, put on casts, and they even got to give oranges real injections! Caitlyn thinks these theme days are SO cool.....during "O" week they had "octopus day" and they examined a real octopus as well as making their own octopus (shaped) pretzels.....during "F" week one day they fixed french toast and fresh fruit....and next week for "P" week they get to make pancakes and their own pillowcases! Anyways, it's lots of fun. So Caitlyn's quick little mind is always coming up with fun ideas for theme days at school. SO, last week, on our way to "nurse day," she excitedly said, "I know! Wouldn't it be weird if we had NAKED day at school?! That would be SO WEIRD! I mean, I wouldn't want to see people naked at school for "N" week!" Um, okay sweetie, I'll be sure NOT to suggest that one to your teacher...

In case you didn't know....

....Superman lives at our house!

Out of the mouths of babes

Caitlyn's little Kindergarten class at the Christian School is having a "teddy bear picnic" on Friday. This is "B" week at school, so the kids were instructed to bring their favorite BEAR from home for the picnic. BUT, first they were given a name tag to bring home, color, fill out, attach to their bear, and return tomorrow. I was working in Caitlyn's class today as the instructions were relayed. Caitlyn was SO excited to finish dinner this evening so that she could get straight to work on her bear's name tag! Micah was doing the dishes (I LOVE my husband, by the way), I was sitting on the couch with a blanket over my head (no really, I was) trying to ignore the fact that our house is a total disaster right now, and the kids got to work on their name tags. (When I work in her class, I bring the other kids with me, and Caitlyn's teacher is GREAT and sent home name tags for our other kids' bears too!) Anyways, I heard Caitlyn shout, "I'M FINISHED!" as she ran into the kitchen to show Daddy her completed tag. I heard Micah laughing hysterically as Caitlyn quickly ran in to show me her completed masterpiece. THIS, my friends, is what I saw:

Yes, you are reading that correctly. It

does, in fact, say "BIG BEER."

I imagine myself escorting Caitlyn into her class tomorrow at the CHRISTIAN SCHOOL and saying, "No really, Mrs. Johnson. I have no idea why Caitlyn would name her adorable, 70's looking tie-dye 'peace bear' BIG BEER. I'm sure what she meant to say was BIG BEAR, she just spelled it BIG BEER."

Letting Go

The first couple of weeks in February were rough here in the Rose household. Micah got sick, then a week later Ellie and I got sick, then a week later Caitlyn got sick, and Ellie got sick again. We all were unfortunate victims of a persistent tummy virus. Fortunately, most of us made a quick recovery and were back to our chipper selves. Caitlyn, however, was not so lucky. Tuesday night, February 8th, we had a normal dinner and then put the kids to bed. Around 9 or 10:00 I heard a loud noise that I couldn't decipher. "Micah--what is THAT?!" Well, it was Caitlyn throwing up. She was not incredibly concerned with making it to the bathroom and made *quite* the mess. Sorry for those of you who are visual learners. ;) Our poor baby continued to be sick all night long, and by Wednesday morning, she literally could not stop dry heaving and we made the trek into Northwest Peds. Caitlyn spent most of the day Wednesday hooked up to IVs to replenish her fluids, and they sent us home, assuming she would wake up fine the next day. Unfortunately she did not wake up fine. We returned to NW Peds and spent 11+ hours there again, with Caitlyn hooked up to IV's for fluids and antibiotics. Unfortunately, when we got there, her tiny veins were incredibly flat and 4 different Doctors and nurses tried repeatedly to get IV's in her. After 2 1/2 hours of trying, a wonderful nurse named Brenda came in and got it on the FIRST TRY. Dr. Polley was literally standing outside our door interceding that Brenda would get it in on her first try. How many people can say THAT of their Pediatrician?! :) Anywhoo, they unhooked her IV around 8:30 Thursday night, sent me home with instructions to flush her IV site overnight, and to give her round-the-clock anti-nausea meds to prevent her from vomiting anymore. We had an appointment for 9:00 Friday morning when we were praying Caitlyn would be well and all they would have to do would be remove her IV. Again, unfortunately, Caitlyn was not well. In fact, her health was deteriorating quickly. Her blood sugar dropped into the low 40s, she was completely lethargic and just plain "out of it." Her electrolytes were completely off and the fluids were just not pumping into her fast enough. Late Friday morning, the nurse practitioner came in and informed us that they needed to admit Caitlyn to St. Peters in Olympia where they had a special pediatric unit. Caitlyn had only peed twice in 48 hours, despite all the fluids going into her, and her illness was now outside their abilities to help her in the office. We put Caitlyn in the car and beelined for Olympia. Caitlyn was so, so listless and groggy. I had to hold her head up against her carseat in the back, and several times I patted her cheeks to make sure she was breathing. I was scared. Like REALLY scared.

Just a few days before this incident I had finished reading a book by Mary Beth Chapman called "Choosing to See." For those of you unfamiliar with who she is, Mary Beth is married to the Christian artist Stephen Curtis Chapman. 2 1/2 years ago, their 18-year-old son ran over their 4 year old daughter in their driveway by accident and killed her. Mary Beth's book was about her journey, her struggle, and ultimately, her surrender to God regarding the lives of her children.

So this Friday morning as we were driving to Olympia, a wave of fear overcame me as I started wondering if "God knew I needed to read that book." I was SCREAMING in my mind at God, BEGGING Him out loud to save our daughter, and WHISPERING in Caitlyn's ear that I loved her so much, and that Mommy and Daddy needed her to be strong and to fight.

I then turned my prayers back to God as I pleaded with him to please, please, not have let me read that book in preparation for losing our baby girl. I couldn't go there.

They were waiting for us when we got to the hospital in Olympia and they got her IV started right away. They also took a bunch of blood to run for testing to make sure there wasn't something else occurring in her body that had gone undiagnosed. The good news was, there wasn't anything else going on other than a serious case of dehydration and an electrolyte imbalance. That bad news was, the Doctor came in and told us that this was the worst case of dehydration she had seen and that Caitlyn was actually a lot sicker than they thought when we first brought her in. Um, thanks a lot Doc....that is JUST the right thing to say to a mom who is already clearly shaken up. We called and texted everyone we knew of to pray. We plastered it on Facebook. We called the church and had her put on the prayer chain. Friends and relatives all over the country were praying. Hard. And we felt it. Right around dinner time Friday night Caitlyn faintly whispered, "I'm hungry. I want a piece of toast." So toast, it was. She ate it slowly, but managed to keep it down and the fluids/anti nausea meds/antibiotics were beginning to do their job. It was amazing to LITERALLY FEEL prayers. To know that so many of you were interceding on our behalf, and joining with our pleas. Thank you. Your prayers were answered. Our prayers were answered. Caitlyn made quick progress and by Saturday afternoon, she was well enough to come home. I couldn't believe it! 24 hours before I was scared to death for her life, and here we were taking our baby girl home! And she was talking! And smiling! What an amazing God we serve!

I want to take just a minute to relay what I am continuing to learn. If I could have predicted my response to a situation like this, I would have thought my knee-jerk reaction would have been to hold on to my kids tighter and to swoon with guilt over all of my shortcomings. But ironically, the very opposite happened. You do not realize how little control you have over your life until it's fragileness is STARING YOU IN THE FACE. You do not realize how desperate and dependent on God you need to be until your circumstances leave you with no other option. God IS sovereign. He IS in control, whether we "give" Him that control or not. He calls the shots. He knows what's best for us. He's got our back.

I am realizing more and more, that the tighter I hold onto my kids, my husband, and my life, the more opportunities God is giving me to let go of those very things I cling to. :) Remember, He is faithful to complete the work He started and if you ask Him to stretch you, He will! I apparently need much more growth as I have had numerous opportunities to surrender to His will in this last year especially and I still have fear every time! You would think that any one of the situations we have faced would leave me in a place of total surrender, but I am clearly a work in progress and have continued to face opportunities requiring faith. My prayer has been one of declaring my trust in God over the lives of my children, and to let go. To really let go. It is easy to say "my kids are the Lord's" but the reality of that is a difficult act of obedience. I HAVE to remember that God gave them to us in the first place! Children are a blessing from the Lord, and each day we have with them is a privilege, not a right.

Finally, here are some photos from our time at NW Peds and at the hospital. Sorry for the poor photo quality, as some of them were taken from my Ipod. :)

at the hospital, not so chipper. :(

Day #3 at NW Peds

Day #2 at NW Peds

First food in 4 days!

Finally going home! Smiling! :)

Ode to my kids

I try. No really, I do. I try to teach my children manners. I try to teach them to put others first, to say "may I be excused," to be polite, and to be honest. Unfortunately, the children have learned the "being honest"part more than they have learned the "being polite" part.....and this makes for frequent embarrassing situations.

Several months ago I was in Michaels craft store with Caitlyn. A heavier set woman rounded the corner into our aisle and could not squeeze by my cart to get to the other end of the aisle. She turned around and Caitlyn said, "Mommy? Why do some peoples bunses (think buns, plural) shake real bad when they walk?" I think my cheeks are STILL a nice shade of pink from that incident.

When we got home that night, I took some time to make that situation what we like to call a "teaching moment." I would like to say that "teaching moments" are something that are effective in our household. However, as I'm sure you will discover by the end of this blog post, my authority on the issue is obviously sub-par. ;)

As part of the "teaching moment" with Caitlyn, we talked about how it isn't polite to talk about people's "bunses" and that if that lady had heard her, her feelings might have been really hurt. We went on to discuss how it is wonderful to encourage people and I gave the kids the opportunity to encourage each other with things that are "true" and "nice." I thought it was a done deal.

Well, the next day I was in Safeway with the previously mentioned child, and when we got to the checkout lane she took one look at the checker and said, "big.......teeth....." The checker smiled and said, "What was that, Sweetie?" Caitlyn replied, "I said I like your nice big teeth!"

Had I not had THREE other children with me at the time, I probably would have zipped up my hood over my face, grabbed her, and bolted for the door. I had nothing to say.

Then there's Caleb. Smart, witty, naive, Caleb. The kid loves humor: Sunday comics, joke books, riddles, and knock-knock jokes. Along with having a school-aged boy apparently comes a fascination with what we call "potty talk." No, Caleb, not every joke has to be about "tooting" or "pooping" or silly noises you make with your hand in your armpit (thank you Daddy for teaching him that one). Anywhoo, we have made it a point to say that "potty talk belongs in the bathroom," and that's where it needs to stay. ("Potty talk" previously resulted in Caleb experiencing the memorable taste of Irish Spring.) ;)

So this morning, Caleb was taking a bath and he was reciting all sorts of *hilarious* jokes to me from memory as I was putting on my makeup. After a few minutes of my courtesy laughing he said to me, "Mommy? Why don't you ever get joke books from the library?" I replied, "Well, Caleb -you tell so many funny jokes that I don't really need to read them for myself. And besides, most joke books they make for Mommies and Daddies are unfortunately not very appropriate. They have a lot of "potty talk" in them. His eyes got really big and I could see his wheels turning. He paused and then said, "Oh! Like what did one wiener say to the other wiener?"

I'll just stop now. And yes, I have a book where I write these things down.

Happy Birthday!

Happy, happy birthday to our sensitive, kind, smart, witty, creative minded Caleb! Mommy and Daddy love you so much and are so proud of the little boy you are!

Back to "Normal"

I realized a few days ago that it has been quite a while since I posted a "baby" update on our blog. 6 months ago today, we picked up the precious baby from the hospital that would forever hold a place in our hearts. Though we didn't know what the future would hold, we poured everything we had into this sweet baby boy: we loved him, bonded with him, and treated him as though he was our own. If you've followed our blog, you know how the story goes....Baby went to live with another foster family along with his siblings, and our hearts were hurting. But! I am SO, SO, SO thankful to say that God truly has healed our hearts, given us perspective, and carried us through. Though it is not something I believe we will ever "get over," we have "gotten through" it and have reached a place where we are just incredibly blessed for the 3 months we were able to provide Baby with a loving, nurturing home.

The foster Mom who has Baby has been so kind, compassionate, and gracious--even sending us photos of him and letting us say "hi" when we run into her at different places. :) This mom knows first hand what it is like to lose a foster child, and I believe that God knew that her compassion towards me would be instrumental in my healing process. It is nice to be able to see Baby once in a while and know that it doesn't sting anymore like it did at first.

We have moved through all of the stages of the grief cycle and have finally come to acceptance. :) Friends, this is truly a work of God--the devastation I felt in those first few weeks was intense, and most nights I felt like I would be heartbroken forever. It was helpful to just let the emotions come and go, and not try to suppress my grief. Poor Micah- one minute we would be sitting there laughing about something silly one of our big kids said, and in the next minute, I would be sobbing hysterically! I'm sure he thought I was nuts! ;)

We decided not to take any new foster kids through the holidays, and to just enjoy a time of rest with our little family. We had such a blessed Christmas season--full of joy, peace, and celebration! We also had court during the last week of December for our "Little Miss." Thankfully, the judge ruled for the permanent plan to remain adoption. We are one step closer to making her a permanent member of our family! Also, we are pleased to announce the name we are going to call her: Eliana (pronounced Ellie-on-uh). I know I can't post what her current "real" name is, but trust me: it does NOT go with our last name. It sounds, well.....how do I say this tastefully......cheap? We have already been calling her a combination of Ellie and her current name so it isn't an abrupt switch.

Eliana means "God has answered." And God HAS answered. He knew our desire for more children. He knew how much our big kids wanted younger siblings. He answered our prayers-- with little Eliana.

We are looking forward to 2011, and are curious who will be joining our family this year! Whether it be for a few days, or forever, I am more confident now than I ever was before that God decides who he places in our care, and for how long. We consider it an honor to be able to play ANY part in the lives of the children He entrusts us with.

Our lives are feeling "normal" at the moment. Our days have routine, and the chaos has settled. I hesitate to type that, though, because I just know that the minute I click "publish" on this blog post, "normal" is going to go flying out the window! Haha! Doesn't it usually work that way? We will probably get a phone call in the middle of the night for triplets or something. :) Oh well, if God asks us to do it, I'm sure we can handle it! On that note, goodnight!